The Front Pew

Blog Readers, Assemble!

2010-04-27T10:00:00.000-06:00

Today is a special update! Still going to do the weekly nonsense, but while I'm at it, I thought I'd bring the full force of my 3 subscribers and dozens of half-interested family members to bear on Washington!

Enough writing about it, let's do something for Jesus.

http://salsa.democracyinaction.org/o/2241/p/dia/action/public/?action_KEY=3097

There's this war that's been going on in Uganda for a long long time. However you feel about war in general, it's hard to feel good about this one. The rebels have been rounding up children, torturing them, then handing them guns and sending them out to fight.

I've called one congressman today, and I'm calling the other one tomorrow, simply because I believe in a risen savior who calls us to do everything we can to bring his kingdom about in our lives and in others' lives. Call a congressman, then do something that actually helps and say a prayer!

(jake)

http://salsa.democracyinaction.org/o/2241/p/dia/action/public/?action_KEY=3097

Of Mouse Tails and Fences, or The Ballad of Desmond Tutu

2010-04-22T22:23:00.000-06:00

I have an office. There are two couches. There are pictures of friends and family, probably a picture or two of you. There is a big desk that I sit at, and on this desk are a few more pictures. Most of my pictures hang loose and get stamped up on the wall, simply because I can't afford that many picture frames. But a few of them are especially special, and these ones get frames. One is a picture of me and my wife (I'm married now, heads up.) and the other is a picture of me and a couple of my best friends on what the legends of York College refer to as, "Fabolus Monday." Ask me about that one, seriously.

There is one other picture in a frame, it sits behind me on my bookshelf. It is a picture of one of my personal heroes, the Archbishop Desmond Tutu. I have a few personal heroes, CS Lewis, Martin Luther King Jr., whoever will eventually replace Dayton Moore as Royals GM, but Desmond Tutu is the one we're talking about today. Without going into multiple paragraphs about why he is significant, I want to talk about a quote from him. (Don't worry, there's still a Bible verse. Just stick with me.)

"If you are neutral in situations of injustice, you have chosen the side of the oppressor. If an elephant has its foot on the tail of a mouse, and you say you are neutral, the mouse will not appreciate your neutrality." - Dezzy T

I know. Bishop Tutu is a clever guy. But seriously, consider this. Consider the implications for your life. Are you neutral? Because the sad fact is, that there is no neutral. Cliche but true, Satan owns the fence.

"I know your deeds, that you are neither cold nor hot. I wish you were either one or the other! So, because you are lukewarm—neither hot nor cold—I am about to spit you out of my mouth." - Revelation 3:15-16

The thing about teaching from the Bible is that it's not all going to make you happy. It will make you a better person, it will make you holier, more blessed, and ultimately someday happier, but at the moment you read it, it will not always make you happy. There's a good chance that today's blog is going to be kind of like that, so if you're the type who likes happiness more than you like truth, I suggest you spend some of your internet time somewhere else. I would suggest icanhascheezburger.com for the remainder of your time online.

Ask yourself something, and do it honestly, wherever you are. Are you really committed to Christ? I'm not asking if you believe, I'm not asking if you're perfect, I'm not asking if you've been overcoming sin in your life, those are all related but different issues. Are you really, truly, and honestly committed to seeking God, and to being a Christian? Are you making some sort of effort to figure out what it means to follow Jesus? If not, then I have bad news.

The way it looks to me, this verse in Revelation is pretty clear on something; God is more annoyed by neutral people than he is by his enemies. And why shouldn't he be? It's not just Jesus and Desmond Tutu; every great leader in history has been more frustrated with apathy than with animosity. Read Dr. King's Letter From a Birmingham Jail if you don't believe me.

Today, unfortunately, I have to call it for what it is. An epidemic of apathy has swept through our Churches. I'm not sure when it happened, if it was before my birth, if it's relatively new, or if it's always been going on, but there are people across the world showing up on Sunday morning, Sunday night, or whenever else your Church meets, and they're not letting a single bit of what happens there bleed into their daily life.

To my readers who are apathetic, please, hear me out. God will puke you up. It's going to be gross in a way that you cannot imagine. Not only that, it's going to be painful and embarrassing. My blog today is a plea for passion; give Jesus just a little bit more of your time. Let the things you learned on Sunday morning affect your week. Start with sermons! Just start by listening to the sermon at your Church, and just one day this week, try to live out whatever it is that the preacher is encouraging. Try it, and see if your life isn't completely different as a result!

Or don't. See if I care.

I do.

(jake)

A Christian Blog that WON'T Mention Glenn Beck

2010-04-14T10:18:00.000-06:00

For the record, I like you guys. I appreciate you reading this madness, sticking with me when I disappear for a few months, and I hope that you get something out of it. If we're not already friends on Facebook, you need to add me. Unless you're that guy that bombs abortion clinics who commented one time. You should go to jail. You're a terrorist.

Switching gears completely, I think I may have found the single most incredible verse in all of scripture. It's in John 14:12 -

"I tell you the truth, anyone who has faith in me will do what I have been doing. He will do even greater things than these, because I am going to the Father."

Okay for a few minutes drop all theology, scholarship, deep thinking and analytical thought and just read that for what it says. Don't over think it, don't start assuming it means something about Church or Holy Spirits, just read the dang thing. Because after 23 years I've finally started doing that. I seriously just read it last night, just really read it and really saw it for what it is, and I seriously nearly freaked out. We will do greater things than Jesus. Greater!

Let's bring everyone up to speed here; Jesus did some big big stuff. He fed thousands, walked on water, RAISED THE DEAD, turned water to wine, cured sickness, RAISED HIMSELF FROM THE DEAD, and preached some pretty killer sermons. Jesus was kind of a big deal. Still is.

But here he is speaking to his disciples, and saying some pretty bold stuff. To think that they would do greater things than Jesus must have been completely thrilling to them! But let's not miss the most significant thing here; Jesus didn't just say this to the people in attendance, he says that anyone who believes in him is going to do even greater things than he did! That means me, you, anyone in the year 2010 AD who believes in Jesus is capable of doing even greater things than Jesus did!

So that brings up the big question; why not? Why aren't we? Why are so many Christians struggling to live up to this promise?

Let me share with you a youth minister secret, the kind of thing that we talk about in upper-division classes, right in between the unit on beards and before the one on how to attract a hot wife. (Yes, it's really covered in class)

The secret is, people will generally give you what you expect of them. (Secretive italics!) In youth ministry what this means is that we shouldn't be afraid to ask a lot of the teens. Most of these guys are taking advanced calculus classes that only 1 in every 100 youth ministers could even sit through, let alone pass. And yet we give them watered down, simple Bible lessons? No no. Not right.

But what this secret means for us as people is that we have to start expecting more of ourselves. We are a culture that is driven by a desire to accomplish things, wanting so desperately to have something that we can say we did, wanting to always find the next big thing to do, and yet in our faith we are content to simply fill a pew once a week?

Or maybe your problem is a low self-esteem? Maybe you, like so many others are afraid of failure, maybe you don't expect much of yourself because you don't think much of yourself. The same Jesus that said that you would do great things also died for you; whether you believe in your own potential or not, Jesus Christ does.

Whether your great deed is to share the gospel with a co-worker, or if God has called you to something more public, like mission work, whatever it is, stop living like you're not called to something better. Realize your own potential, and live like it.

(jake)

PS - I know, it's been a while. But I have office hours now, and I am way more available to write this nonsense. Tell your friends about this blog. Better yet, tell your enemies, it's a great way to settle an old score.

Bad Dates

2009-11-20T08:32:00.001-06:00

Hey guys. Sorry I've been AWOL. I've got most of a devo finished, I've just been super sick for the last few days. I'll get the new one up soon, I promise.

You Don't Know Jake

2009-11-08T20:08:00.005-06:00

I have 3 followers! This post is hereby dedicated to Ric McBath, Aaron Nelson, and Shane Latham. Thanks for humoring me, Jesus will reward you heavily one day.

So let's jump back to my education. Yes, I know, still in school. 5.5 years now. This is in fact my 11th semester of undergraduate work. Just to give a little perspective, my friend Sheila Smesrud and I started college the exact same semester...she'll be getting a doctorate in May, just a few months after I pick up my first Bachelor's. It's okay to laugh, really.

Anyway, I'm in a psychology class right now. On the off chance that anyone from that class ever reads this, understand that I have the utmost respect for the field of psychology and am actually enjoying the class a lot. That being said, I often find myself in an interesting predicament in my psychology class. I get annoyed with the theories being presented. No joke, it has actually been proposed by "experts" that people are genetically programmed to cheat on their spouses because they have an instinct to spread their genes as much as possible.

What I've learned in this class more than anything is that I do not like people trying to, "figure me out." I don't like being reduced to a theory, or being defined by a series of behaviors. Call me romantic, but I just prefer to believe that there's more to people than patterns.

Of course being a fairly hypocritical person, it wasn't too long before I realized that I do the very same thing all the time! As I've shifted my education more and more to Biblical Studies, I've slowly begun to view God as something to figure out. Rather than being the infinite creator of my world, he's the theory that keeps me motivated, and he's the force that I might just figure out if I tweak my theology enough. I've got to wonder, if I get annoyed at people trying to decipher me and reduce me to a theory, how must God feel being constantly debated and reduced to theology?

There is this beautiful and epic scene in the Old Testament. It's at the end of a book called Job, a book that is actually one long epic poem in the original Hebrew language. There's a lot to it, but I'll just give you the broad strokes; Job has had a really bad day. Really bad. And he's been trying to figure it out, trying to figure out why God would let that happen. He's actually gone so far as to demand that someone explain it to him, and amazingly enough, God shows up! Trust me, I read a lot of books, watch a lot of movies, and I'm telling you, there are very few scenes in all of literature as beautiful or epic as this. God confronts Job, and tells it like it is.

The incredible thing about all of this scene is that God never gives Job the explanation he's been waiting for! He never once bothers to say, "Job, funny thing, this was all Satan, and I'm here to fix it!" He never says, "Job, everything gets better after you suffer, this was making you a better person!" He just shows himself to Job, and says, "I'm God. You're not. Trust me."

Job's response is equally epic. He says, "Surely I spoke of things I did not understand; things too wonderful for me to know!" - Job 42:3

There's a point where I really just wish that all the psychologists and theorists in the world would just let Jake be Jake. I wish they'd just accept that maybe there's no deeper reason for my behavior than, "It seemed like a good idea," or, "I like comic books." (Two really big reasons why I do everything.) I get the feeling that God feels the same way. I'm paying a lot to learn about him, I'm not saying we shouldn't learn everything we can, but there's a point where we have to accept that God is beyond our understanding. He's just too big!

Eternity; think it over. Go on, try it. I'll be here when you come back.

Scary, huh? That's God. That's all you need to know. That's all we get. And you know what? I've begun to accept that. I didn't always; I still don't always. I have trouble with it. I want to understand, and I want to get my ministry down to a science. I want to be able to tell people that there are certain things that always work, and that no matter what the following 3 points will always be right. (Church of Christ joke.) But that's not how it is. God is just too big and too hard to figure out. But what that does mean is that even though everything else seems shaky, even though it's nearly impossible to find any solid truth in this world, one thing will always be true; God is big, God is strong, and God loves us.

Chill out. Take it from someone who's learning this the hard way. Life is way too short to try and understand. Just do your best, follow God, and trust me when I say that he's got it figured out.

(jake)

Middle Drawer Faith

2009-10-30T09:00:00.001-06:00

"Unless you change and become like one of these children, you will never enter the Kingdom of Heaven." - Matthew 18:3

Interesting verse. Lock it down in your brains, we'll come back to it in a bit.

Remember 1997? It was a really good year. Tiger Woods won his first Masters, Mike Tyson bit Evander Holyfield's ear, and a giant Tonka Truck was sent to Mars, where it eventually ran into a rock and stopped talking to us. A little band called dcTalk was proving the Christian music wasn't always corny, and ska music was reaching its peak. It was in this specific year that a young Jake Owens was introduced to a then-rapidly-growing fad. I'm speaking of course about the WWJD bracelet. They came in an assortment of colors, red, blue, purple, teal, etc. Mine was green. Not a bright green, but a dark, strong, forest green. The color of a person's WWJD bracelet said a lot about them and how they served God. The green bracelet just happened to scream, "Will lose his hair by the time he's 20 and eventually surrender to the fact that he's not good at anything other than teaching Sunday School and playing video games." Don't even ask me what a yellow bracelet said about someone.

For my readers who are either older than 30 or younger than 20, you have to understand what these bracelets were all about. See, in ancient times, Christians were persecuted, so they had to come up with clever ways of identifying one another as Christians. In 1997, the true believers identified themselves with a colorful bracelet on the wrist. It meant you got it. It was a sign that you were not just a "christian," but that you were a, "CHRISTIAN." (The difference is subtle, but I'm relatively certain it has something to do with whether you can sing harmony on Light the Fire or not.)

So for a while, things were wonderful. But then that terrible, horrible, dark year of 1998 approached, and the inevitable happened. The fad. WWJD was no longer something secret and sacred, suddenly it was something cheerleaders wore! Suddenly it was a way of identifying who was cool! Suddenly the beautiful people wanted to know me, because I was wearing the same bracelet as them! I remember sitting in the cafeteria with my friends and wanting to scream, "NO! This isn't right! You're not supposed to match your bracelet with your shoes! You're supposed to let it scream something about your faith!" We all fought that long culture war, but in the end, as they always do, the trendsetters won out, and the bracelet became just another accessory. Sometime around 1999, I sadly put my green WWJD bracelet away in the middle drawer for good, to be lost amongst so many back-issues of Nintendo Power.

Now look; I've spent a lot of the last couple of years trying to rediscover my 6th grade faith. Somewhere along the line between 12 and 23, I let my faith become less...potent. It's not that I love God less, it just feels like for some reason I don't rely on him as much. Maybe I grew up and started thinking I was able to take care of myself, maybe I just grew up. Who knows. The point is, 12 year old Jake was a titan of faith. That kid would stand on a bus stop with drug dealers and chain smokers and not bat an eye, because he knew that Jesus protected him. He used to stay awake late at night to pray longer, because he knew it would make tomorrow better. 23 year old Jake? He's having trouble waking up 20 minutes before class to say a prayer.

I'm not about to say that that bracelet was directly tied to my faith, but what I did notice is that the bracelet left about the time I started to develop a healthy dose of cynicism in my attitude. Suddenly, just because other people had diluted the importance of WWJD, I didn't want anything to do with it. The bracelet was just a symptom of something deeper; my faith had become jaded. I was suddenly analyzing others' faith, trying to pinpoint what they were doing wrong so I could "fix" it. I put that bracelet in the drawer about the same time that I started complaining that no one was as enlightened as I was, whining about how youth events could have been done better, trying to identify what others should be doing for me.

Lately my prayers have been a little different. Rather than praying to God for a deeper understanding of him, or praying that he fixes everyone else's attitude, I've started praying that God restores the faith of my youth. It was a selfless faith, one that didn't critique and judge others' performance, the kind of faith that just loved to be among Christians and to worship with them.

Again, I can't be sure that this applies to you. But be honest; do you complain a lot? Do you lean over to the person beside you and complain about how much you hate when Song Leader A leads this song, or how you wish we hadn't moved to the gym, or how much assigned seating bugs you, or what speaker you wish they had instead. Is your faith conditional? Are you only joyful when things go a certain way? Or do you rejoice that God has called you? Do you spend your time being joyful because God is joyful, praising because he deserves it, and loving others because they're God's children too?

It occurs to me that having the faith of a child isn't about anything more than being content, being happy, and being joyful simply that God has called you to be his child. The faith of a child isn't a silly faith or an oversimplified one, it's a faith that lacks cynicism.

The other day, while deep cleaning The 305, I found a WWJD bracelet under my desk. I'm not sure where it came from, but it was in pristine condition. I turned it over backwards, strapped it on, then flipped it, so that it wouldn't come loose. My new bracelet is red. Red seems to be the color that says, "Nothing good is ever truly lost."

(jake)

God's Insanity is Greater than man's Sanity

2009-10-23T00:27:00.000-06:00

You knew this was coming. Maybe you dreaded it, maybe you were hoping for it, but one way or another, you knew I'd be back. How am I? Well I'm getting married now. That's pretty exciting. I also now fit into size 38 pants, which hasn't happened for a long long time. They're lime green corduroy pants to boot. I know, you missed me.

Let me give you a look into my life currently. At age 23, I am just a few short months away from marriage and graduation. (Not in that order) I am currently involved in trying to find a job, and while some prospects are beginning to look promising, I wanted to share a little insight, let you see what's going on in this twisted mind of mine.

As I've been searching for a job, I've had this constant temptation. Namely, the temptation to settle for less. Now mind you, I'm not trying to make a statement about what makes a good Church or a bad Church. But you know me, and if you've read even a few of the things I've written on here you know that I'm not going to be able to work at just any Church. That's okay; lots of Churches won't work for a lot of people. It's not about right or wrong, it's about finding the right fit.

The temptation however comes in when a Church that isn't a good fit looks like it would have good money, or at least secure money. Look, it's hard to admit. I'm not getting into ministry for the money, but when you're staring down the barrel of a gun called "responsibility" it's hard to not stop and consider the best financial option. Ministry isn't about money, but that doesn't change the fact that everyone has to eat. Everyone also has to pay of 5 years worth of student loans. Everyone also has to get married. Everyone also has to pay ridiculous gas prices (I refuse to accept $2.75 as okay) and everyone also has to find health insurance and still hopefully have enough money to go out with the new wife once in a while and possibly even revive a long-lost video game hobby. Everyone has a lot on everyone's mind.

So the other day, no joke, I sat down and looked at several job opportunities. There was the temptation to leap in headfirst, and to just start dishing out resumes like so much Halloween candy corn. But my mind keeps drifting back to one of my favorite parts of scripture, the Corinthian Epistles. This is the part where I start talking Bible!

Paul started this Church in Corinth. Then he left. While he was gone, people started looking around at how the local bigwigs ran things. They saw this group called the Sophists, who were (I'm not making this up) fond of teaching people by screaming at each other, and having their students pull pranks on one another. The Corinthian Church saw all of this and thought, "Whoa, those guys are awesome. People would want to be a part of our Church if we were more like that!" The end result? Well of course the Church all turned on one another and began having shouting matches and trying to sabotage one another.

So Paul gets wind of this from someone who works for Phoebe, the lady who helped run the Church in Corinth. He's obviously not pleased, so he writes them a letter, and one of the first (and best) lines in the whole thing goes like this: "The foolishness of God is wiser than man's wisdom, and the weakness of God is stronger than man's strength." -1 Corinthians 1:25

You should seriously read the book yourself, but let me sum it up. Paul is explaining to the Corinthians that God's way is always best, even when it looks like the least intelligent way of doing things. Maybe it doesn't look that smart to forgive that person that hurt you so bad; doesn't matter. God knows better than you. Maybe it seems like a dumb idea to give any of your money to other people right now, what with the economy down so much. Do it anyway. Even at his weakest, God is stronger than us or any financial market.

For me, what this reminded me is that God's will for me is best. I might want to seek out the first and most secure thing that comes my way, but God has something better. God will take care of my money, and he will lead me to a Church where I fit, and where I can maximize my affect on the Kingdom. On a side note, shortly after reading this and making the decision to stop pursuing a few specific job opportunities, I was given a promotion at work and am getting paid basically double what I was. God's already got my back.

You? I don't know if this applies to you. Sadly the best I can do is write what God puts on my heart and hope that it connects with you. But know that I love you, and that I have already prayed that God will clear your mind, and show you his will. It will probably look insane. Turning the other cheek, going the extra mile, and trusting an unseen God with your financial security all looks insane. But from one insane person to another, it's a pretty darn good way to live.

(jake)

Back?

2009-10-01T19:51:00.001-06:00

I believe I will begin writing here again. I feel the creative flow....well, flowing. Brace yourselves.

jake

Blessed Are You When People Call You "Bible-Thumper"

2008-08-10T12:35:00.004-06:00

I try not to be too political with my thinking and with my writings, and I give you my word as a gentleman that I had already written most of this a few weeks ago, but I think it is important to mention something before I go into this blog. Today, this very morning, our President visited a Chinese State Church. For those of you unfamiliar with China and its practices regarding religion, the State Church is a dumbed down, powered down, and God-downed version of Christianity, for those people who would like to go to Church but just don't want all of the hardship it can bring in a communist nation. It's very troubling to me that the leader of our "Christian" nation would go and embrace the public face of persecution. I say all of that just to do my little part to make people more aware, and to inform you that this post is written in honor of and in prayer for all of those who suffer in the name of a risen savior, a just God, and the hope of a redeemed world.

All that being said, I got to thinking about persecution a couple of weeks ago. I heard a sermon about how to react to being persecuted, and I looked around the room. I don't know what your Church is like, but the VH is pretty typical of the sort of congregation I grew up in; very white, very middle class, very well off. The point? In the year of our Lord, 2008, in the United States of America, in the nation's midwestern breadbasket, it is hard to conceive that middle class white people are being persecuted by anyone for anything.

Lets start with a verse that I think is troubling to many modern Christians; "In fact, everyone who wants to live a godly life in Christ Jesus will be persecuted, while evil men and impostors will go from bad to worse, deceiving and being deceived." - 2 Tim 3:12-13

See, there is this thought in early Christianity that the powers that be are not going to like what Jesus and his Church do. From the earliest moments of his ministry, Jesus is speaking of persecution, and ensuring his followers that they'll be blessed in Heaven for suffering for his sake on Earth. It's amazing to me how modern Christianity has managed to dilute the word persecution. Once upon a time it meant imprisonment, torture, and eventually a gruesome death for those that wouldn't renounce Jesus. Today? Well if most of the preachers I've heard are to be believed, it apparently means getting teased for wearing a WWJD bracelet and not listening to Eminem.

So what I'm asking, what makes this verse so uncomfortable is this; why aren't we being persecuted? The way I see it, there are two possibilities here. Either this world, or at least our own little corner of it has finally seen the light and joined up with God's way of doing things, or we as Christians are not doing our duty.

I'm sure you can guess which way I lean; so my challenge to you? Figure out what you're leaving out. I'm not gonna give all of the answers here, go read you a bible! Dig around, see what Jesus wanted from us, figure out why the world hated him, and why it seems to love us so much. Maybe if you're really good at it you'll upset some government and start a persecution.

(jake)

For more information on the persecuted Church in China and across the world, visit The Voice of the Martyrs at http://www.persecution.com/ If you really wanna stir things up, go to www.cc.org (The Christian Coalition) and www.focusonthefamily.com and ask them why their boy Dubbya is getting buddy buddy with the persecutors.

And They're Always Glad You Came

2008-07-23T23:28:00.003-06:00

Okay, it's beginning to flow a little better. Rather than racking my brain for something profound each week, I'm getting back into the groove of just spewing forth whatever God's put on my heart. Brace yourselves for spew.

The scum of the Earth gather there, because they feel welcome there. Some of them are actually highly successful people who have come to wrestle with their demons, perfectly normal and healthy people who simply need some support to keep up with the good work. Good, bad, ugly, all are welcome, all are wanted. Some get extremely involved and are regulars; others simply show up and enjoy the good vibes.

Or there is our second location. It's a high class place, filled with the wealthy and elite. It's a club that seems easy enough to get into, but for some reason a lot of people have trouble sticking around there. The elite rulers of the day are strong advocates, using their membership to springboard themselves into greater positions of power, from which they further exploit the weak and the poor. Everyone is well groomed, everyone is clean, everyone looks perfect. Sadly, beneath the surface there is a great deal of sin and corruption dealing beneath the surface. It's not that the people here are wicked, that they enjoy their state, it's just that no one's ever taken the time to show them any better.

Scene one? A bar.

Scene two? A Church.

Sure, not all Churches are like that, I know, I attend a couple of pretty good ones. And no, bars aren't exactly wholesome places. Still, can't argue with the facts.

I really wish Church were more like a bar.

(jake)

Hitchiker's Guide to Eternity

2008-07-22T06:00:00.000-06:00

Ugh. It seems like everytime I get on a roll with this thing and get a decent number of people reading again, I fall out of the loop and forget to post for a month or three. So, for the first of this semester's 3 posts...

To me, that title is brilliant. It's a little known fact that my favorite part of writing these blogs is writing the title. I also wash my hands before I read and sometimes pray for super powers. Seriously, you couldn't handle 20 minutes in my brain.

So while in the land down under I kept thinking about the Bible. I have been thinking about the Bible a whole lot lately, because as you all know I'm now a Bible Major. I spend a lot of time doing homework about the Bible. Why do I say this? Because I think that for a vast majority of my life I have viewed the Bible incorrectly.

Rob Bell is a favorite author of mine, and in his book Velvet Elvis, he implores us to drop the whole Bible-as-an-instruction-manual analogy. I have to say, I love this idea, and I want to second it. It's time we stopped looking at the holy word of the divine God as a rules list.

I got to thinking about this, and how much of the greater sins I've committed against people in my life have really been born of that misunderstanding of scripture. Because I thought that the Bible was a set of rules, I judged people and treated them like I was better than they were. Because I misread Jesus' teachings on grace, I treated people like they were beneath me. If you are a regular reader, or if you're bored enough to trail back a couple of posts, you'll notice my conflict with Cross Guy. I honestly used to think like Cross Guy, I'm ashamed to say, and I think that it's because I wanted to see the Bible as a rulebook.

Now let me clarify; I'm not saying we shouldn't follow the rules in the Bible. God does give some direct commands, and they should be obeyed. But if that's all you're making it, if you're taking this precious gift from God and making it something as simple and legalistic, then you've completely missed the point I'm afraid.

I struggled a lot to find bible verses that would sum this up, because this feels like the sort of thing that it is so important to have God's backing on. The one that seems logical is 2 Timothy 3:16, which says that all scripture is God-breathed and useful for training in righteousness. It seems to me that the term "God-breathed" probably means that it was something straight from the mouth of God, something that carried with it his very will and his heart. I mean think about it, the main time that we see God breathing something into existence, it isn't a rule book, it's a freaking human being! God doesn't breathe things that are unliving, the breath of God is universally recognized as something that brings life.

So where does all of this lead? My point is to make us rethink scripture and how we study it. Just memorizing the facts is fine at first, but read the stories, read the words of God, the way he treats his people, the way he cares for them no matter what; learn to mimic the ways of God. Scripture is more than a list of rules, it is a unique look straight into the heart of God, a wonderful examination of the very nature of God, of who he is and what he wants from his people; read it to learn who God is, and in turn, to learn who you are. I promise you, this is something that will completely change your life.

(jake)

-This post is dedicated to Cindy Hess.

A Conundrum if You Will...

2008-05-19T22:47:00.003-06:00

I am stranded in York for two more weeks. Every morning I get up and look out my window at the dead campus and let a single tear roll down my eye, pollution-indian style.

Anywho, in keeping with the great educators of history, this week I choose to teach by posing questions. The following is a series of questions that were posed in my Wednesday night High School class last week, and I've got to say, they handled it very well. So now, allow me to play Yoda to your Luke.

I'm not going to directly cite any scripture today, which might be a gutsy move, but I would rather that you open scripture and search for yourself on this one. I will direct you to the Sermon on the Mount in early Matthew, and James 2, starting around verse 15. Now, moving on.

Consider two people. First, a personal hero of mine whose picture hangs on my wall next to one of my many Spiderman posters. No, not Optimus Prime. Mahatma Gandhi. In case you're not up to date on your Indian civil rights leaders, let me fill you in. Gandhi quit a job as a high paid lawyer in order to live with the Untouchables, a group of people in India who were seen as literally, untouchable. They lived in poverty and disease, because they were considered outside society, beneath the notice of civilization. Gandhi dedicated his life to these people, living among them and living like them, trying to help them. This is in fact the most Christ-like thing I've heard of since feeding a multitude.

Unfortunately Gandhi had a major problem in his worldview, namely, Hinduism. Now I'm not about to denigrate someone else's beliefs, but at the same time, I'm not about to say that all roads lead to God. They don't. Some roads lead to lots of vague and fictitious gods, and that's what Gandhi chose.

Exhibit B however is one of my least favorite people in the world. While he has yet to acknowledge our feud publicly, I consider this man to be one of my arch-enemies. I am of course speaking of Pat Robertson of the 700 Club. Pat, for those of you not in the know, has used his media empire to spread wonderful Christian beliefs. Like the time he said that 9-11 was the will of God, brought on to punish us because of feminism. (Might have been Katrina, I'm not entirely sure, so if you read this Pat, don't go getting all techinical on me. You know what I'm getting at.)

So Pat Robertson, a man who is far more concerned with making sure we know who goes to Hell than with helping others get to heaven, calls on the name of Jesus Christ as his Lord and savior. While I'm never ever going to say that Pat Robertson is any kind of Christian, at the same time, I also have to believe that grace can cover hypocrisy and bigotry, or a great number of Christians, including myself, are all going to Hell.

So consider this a different sort of post; rather than a challenge or a moral, today I leave you with a question. Which of these two is more pleasing to God? The man who lives a Christ-like life outside of Christ, or the man who embraces all encompassing grace but denies it to others?

(jake)

Broken Tools

2008-05-13T23:33:00.006-06:00

So I have a confession: I have not been in Mexico for two months. I have in fact been in York, Nebraska, finishing up the fourth year of what I'm beginning to suspect is a forty year wandering as punishment for some past sin. The good news is that I am still playing guitar, and I believe it shows; last night some stranger paid for my food at Buffalo Wild Wings, and just today, the girl at the coffee shop gave me a few extra packages of tea as I bought my rooibus. I've said it before, chicks dig the artsy type.

So I have begun to consider leadership. A little late in the game perhaps, but it is important I think that I re-evaluate. I'm not always the best leader, and next year I've got more to lead.

So I took to reading from the Bible, specifically the parts that deal with The Jesus and his take on leadership. Now there are lots of great passages, and one that I want to focus in on, but first I want to take a look at something written by Paul. Pay close attention children, as I can only perform this trick once:

For the foolishness of God is wiser than man's wisdom, and the weakness of God is stronger than man's strength. (1 Cor 1:25)

Understand before we go any further on this adventure that God is not concerned with how humans do things. Humanity views leadership as an upward climb, a battle to the top. You step on who you can to get higher up, you demonstrate the most strength, and people will inevitably respect and follow you. Basically, the idea is to look like you have everything together, even though we all know no one has it all together. Maybe we follow people like this in order to forget our own brokenness? "Hey, he's got it figured out. If I do like him, maybe I'll get all of my crap together." The incredible thing is, that that person we're following is likely every bit if not more broken than we are.

Okay, so with all of that in mind, here's the Jesus part. There's this great passage in Mark where Jesus is just sitting down after a long journey, and he decides he's going to nail the disciples. See, earlier on the road they had been arguing about who was greatest of them, and Jesus decides to put in his two cents. And what does he say? Simply this.

"If anyone wants to be first, he must be the very last, and the servant of all." (Mark 9:35b)

You getting that? Jesus doesn't want people who are powerful and have it all together. If you don't think that's what this verse means, then read the whole freaking story of his life. Jesus didn't show up and change the world by finding the rich and powerful; he went to the broken, the rejected. He picked fishermen and con-men to be his best friends, and then went and hung out with hookers and sick people. What do all of these have in common?

Brokenness.

I submit to you that I, Jake Owens, am a poor leader, because I am completely wrapped up in getting it all together, and projecting an aura of confidence and power. I have wasted my time and talent on trying to appear like I have life figured out, when in reality, I have no freaking clue what I'm doing. I am 22 years old, still in college, and doing my absolute best to figure out how to get out of debt. Sometimes I avoid saying hi to people not because I don't like them or because I'm shy, but because I just assume the don't want to talk to me. Somedays I worry I might be borderline OCD, and every day I wonder if I'll ever get my student loans paid off.

I am messed up. And God still chooses me, and God still loves me.

Leadership is not about getting it all together. Leadership is about admitting to God how broken you are, and letting him do what he will with you. One of the most wonderful things about Jesus is that he does his best work with broken tools like me.

(jake)

Hola Ninos!

2008-03-14T10:09:00.002-06:00

I'm gonna be in the land down under (Mexico) for a week or so. I've got a few good ideas for blog when I get back. I'll try and get one posted before I leave, but don't hold out on that. More to come true believers!

(jake)

Comfortably Dead

2008-03-06T00:35:00.003-06:00

I have been learning guitar. My fingers hurt pretty bad while typing the last blog, but now they just don't feel at all. I kind of hate that, but I am really convicted that God wants me to play guitar, because I think it will make girls love me, and I think that God wants that for me. I also buy lotto tickets and pray over them. True story.

Bible classes now consume my life. The good news is that I love the Bible, so it's been a pretty good semester so far. One thing I have noticed in my scholarly pursuits of the Old Testament is an interesting trend with the people of Israel. See, early on in Israel's career as a nation, they were just a loose group of tribes, who were constantly harassed by other nations. God always bailed them out, and that was the system. Trust God, live well.

Eventually, Israel decided they'd had enough of that, and asked for a king. Without posting the whole verse, in the book of 1 Samuel God essentially declares that the Israelites have rejected him as their king. Then, he goes on to declare that the king would be horrible for them, and ruin them. He says that this king will turn their hearts away from God, and that he will lead them to destruction. But they want it, so he gives it.

Skip ahead. Ignore a couple centuries of history. Israel now wants a temple. Specifically, the aforementioned king wants to build a temple. Again I will leave the scripture out, but it's in the reign of Solomon that the temple is built, and during David's reign that the idea comes about, which is in 1 Kings and 2 Samuel respectively. But God's not too keen on the temple thing either. He's more than happy to live in a tent, and to dwell among his people. Still, he gives them what they want.

So where does this lead? Why exactly where God said it would! See, king after king after king continues to bring in pagan Gods, and destroy the worship of Yahweh, the true God of Israel. And as the Temple becomes more and more important, the Hebrew nation begins to forget the real purpose of the ceremonies, of the sacrifices, all of it. They eventually become comfortable in their faith, revelling in the security that their kingdom and religion have given them.

Then God gets mad.

In Isaiah, the Lord says: "These people come near to me with their mouth and honor me with their lips, but their hearts are far from me. Their worship of me is made up only of rules taught by men.

God is ticked! God sends these nasty guys called the Babylonians to kick butt and take names. The entire nation is destroyed, eventually the temple is ransacked and trashed, the king sent into exile, and for all of her safety and comfort, Israel is reduced to a pile of rubble.

Then things get fixed.

The amazing thing about the story of Israel is that it is in exile, in suffering, in the most horrible and shameful experience of its history as a nation, the people of God rediscover just what it means to serve Yahweh. With the protection of the king gone, with the religious security of the temple gone, Israel is finally stripped down to bare bones and forced to turn back to the God who loves them enough to send them into exile.

I am not blaming God for our struggles, nor am I suggesting that church buildings and appointed leaders are evil. (Thought about it, but decided against it.) I am saying that in the end, it is not the comfortable times that I remember God from, it is the painful ones. When I look back on my life, the most precious moments shared between me and my Lord were the ones where I was hurting the most.

Sometimes it takes suffering to break us down and expose us to God's glory. In exile, we rediscover who we are, and what God intends for us. I pray that whoever may read this will be blessed with the wisdom to see through their suffering, to the glorious work that God is preparing them for.

(jake)

Of Eye Pokes and Tooth Fairies

2008-02-24T01:53:00.005-06:00

Tomorrow morning I will do something terrifying. I will drive an hour and a half to southern Nebraska to preach to people I have never met before. I am told that this is a great honor, that people enjoy hearing me speak. Rather, I just think God is making me wander all over Nebraska like some sort of wilderness until I'm ready to do his work. Another blog for another day I suppose.

Us against them. It's a mentality that permeates our society, our very way of life. Race, gender, economics, religion, heck, what side of the cafeteria you sit on, it's all one big way of deciding whether you're with us, or with them. I wonder a lot how we got to this point, if there's something encoded in us post-Eden that makes us need an adversary of some kind. Even our view of God is affected; a lot of times we give Satan way too much credit by picturing him on the same playing field as the Almighty, simply because we assume God has to be fighting someone, he has to have some sort of enemy.

I say all of this to make myself look less sinful when I admit that I am in fact one of the worst about this. When I was young, I was surrounded by a very dogmatic form of Christianity, and it was all us against the other denominations. As I got older and began feeling ashamed of that line of thinking, it became us against people who hate other denominations. Then it was us against pharisees, because that sounded better, then it finally settled into us against the non-Christians. It's really very sad to be honest, and I hope you'll accept my apologies on behalf of all humanity.

Having confessed that, I have a story to tell. It happened last semester, and remains one of the best nights of my life. I was going to Lincoln with a bunch of friends, and as I was driving through the labyrinthine parking of O Street, I saw a few other friends of mine standing on a street corner screaming at some people holding signs.

Let me back up.

There is a guy in Lincoln, or it might be a couple of guys working in shifts, who carries around a cross. He stands on O Street, a busy party-type street, and shouts at people walking by. He screams at them that they're sinners, that they're going to burn in Hell, and accuses them of things they probably have never done. At least I've never done any of the things he's accused me of. (Baby killing being primary among those. I've also never had any kind of romantic entanglement with another man. He accused me of both. No lie. It's the bald head. SCREAMS infanticidal Nazi homosexual.)

So occasionally, this group of people come out to defend homosexuals. Primarily homosexuals. I think they just don't like Cross Guy, but they seem to especially hate that he's down on the gays. On this particular night, they were holding signs that said things like, "Homosexuals are People," and were handing out a pamphlet accusing God of being a bad guy who murdered people. Now I'm not saying I agreed with the pamphlet, but the signs weren't really that offensive. I happen to think that homosexuals are people too. Remember, raised by an ex-hippy.

Anyway, I manage to park (5 blocks down!) and walk back to the corner, happy to see my friends still locked in a shouting match with the Humanists. (That's who I later found out they were.) The humanists were very adament that we were very foolish for believing in God, and that if God really loved people he wouldn't hate gays or bomb abortion clinics. My friends were very upset and began shouting at these guys that they were just ignorant and were going to Hell. Really ugly scene, gotta be honest.

I say all of this to tell you that God works through broken vessels like me. That night, with one faithful friend sticking with me, the rest either running or shouting, I managed to preach the gospel to about 15 people on a street corner. It was exhilirating, unlike anything I had ever experienced. I raised my voice and began to speak loudly to the Humanists, explaining to them that Cross Guy was no more a Christian than they were. That the will of God was more about loving people than it was about stopping gay people from getting married. I explained to them that God wants more than for us to stop sinning, he wants us to start loving. And I told them that by showing up to love some sinners, they had done the will of God without even meaning to. By the time I stopped to take a breath, I realized that there was a small crowd growing.

We walked away that night friends. I shook hands and even hugged a few of them. (Except the fat chick with cartilage piercings who blew cigarette smoke in my face. Can't win 'em all.) Did they drop to their knees and beg to be baptized on the spot? No. But they left knowing that Cross Guy doesn't represent me, and he certainly doesn't represent my God.

I guess the point I'm making here is that if God can bring those people into my life and teach me about his love through Secular Humanists, then he can certainly teach me something through traditional right-wing Christians, through alcoholic athletes, elitist nerds, or any other opposing social group I've labeled as a "them". There is no them guys. It's just one big us. And if us don't start looking out for each other, then none of us will ever find any kind of heaven.

(jake)

Banana-Flavored Faith

2008-02-20T01:53:00.002-06:00

That's right, after a few months of absence, I'm about to strike back like the Empire! A few people have mentioned that they liked these, and my brain is flowing at normal speed again, so here we go again. I was going to save this until after next week because it was going to be my devo, but Greg's tonight was both fantastic and a lot like this, so I decided instead to make this a blog and the devo will be changed.

I'll go ahead and say it; I love my life. I have a great life's story that I really feel would make a good movie or book. Several other people think so too, so that makes it fact. My life is really the final act in a series of stories about some fantastic people and how they overcame their own challenges; I basically like to think of myself as the climax of several stories. (Literature nerd, I know.) The person I want to focus on is kind of the one who started all of this, my grandmother, or as we called her, Nanny.

I've talked about my grandmother a few times at school, but to bring everyone up to speed, she was hands down the coolest old lady alive. She was going to be a nun until she met my granddad, but by the time I came along she was essentially the definition of a "tough old bird." Granddad left her for a younger lady, but left her a nice chunk of money to live on in return. Nanny didn't bake me cookies but once (best cookies ever, the standard by which I still judge all subsequent cookies.) and she never knitted me anything. She did however teach me to keep score on a Cubs game, and explained to me that even when you're watching at home you have to get up and sing along when Harry Carray leads Take Me Out to the Ball Game. One of my favorite things about her house was the fruit; Nanny had great fruit, and my favorite was always bananas.

Whenever I eat a banana, I get swept away in nostalgia, remembering Nanny cussing at the announcers when they insulted Sammy Sosa, or how she used to take care of that nasty black cat I was so scared of. I can even remember the smell of her house, a good catholic house; cheap wine and cigarettes. But you know what? Banana-flavored candy isn't the same. This may seem like a no brainer for you, but for me it's shocking. Banana flavored taffy, runts, whatever, none of it invokes the same memories. It's fake, false, a substitute, and it fails to remind me of that tough old lady who taught me so much.

I guess I feel like our faith is like that. I don't mean for this to be one of the many rip on America posts out there, but the fact is that Christianity in this country is so screwed up. Sure, it's kind of like what Jesus wanted, but how is it any different from the other things out there? What I mean is, maybe the reason people aren't flocking to churches is because we're offering the same thing they can get at any other social club, like boy scouts, or scrapbooking circles, or book clubs. Are we really any different, or are we one more imitation that offers something similar to the real thing?

Faith is more than just a set of political beliefs, and it's a lot more than just sitting around with people who think like you do. True faith is to love people unconditionally, to sacrifice ANYTHING for other people, the same way Jesus did. I tried to find a verse that summed this up, and then I realized, it's all over the whole freaking Bible! The thing is full of it! If we were really offering that authentic flavor of faith, I think people would be way more interested in us.

So the point? No, it's not to go rage against the machine and burn the mother down. Leave your churches standing, they're full of good people who love God. The point here? Let your faith be real. Study the bible for yourself and see what God really wants. Find someone to love. Find an unlovable person, someone not deserving or not receiving unconditional love, and give it to them. That my friends is real faith. None of this bullcrap, "Keep the gays from marrying!" faith-flavored junk.

(jake)

Stickyfeet

2007-09-08T22:00:00.000-06:00

Well I'm beginning this back in my apartment. The good news is that it's still a pretty artistic place, eccentric at the very least. I'm watched over by Optimus Prime and Bob Marley, Spiderman and Dr. King. It's the kind of place a genius child would hang out, or at least that's what I like to tell myself when I wake up and adjust the action figures on my desk.

I'm still in the gospels. I can't get enough of it, for real, one of my favorite things about scripture is that the older I get the newer it feels. It's like reading it for the first time and it's really amazing. That being said, let me tell you what I noticed this time through.

Luke tells a story of Jesus eating at a Pharisee's house. I like this image because I picture this like when James Bond eats dinner with Blowfeld right before their big showdown, both of them pretending to be civil, but knowing that this is really about a conflict that's been long coming.

So there sits Jesus, eating what I'm sure was a much nicer meal that he normally got. When I travel I eat a lot of fast food, so I can only imagine the horrors Jesus ate on the road between desert cities. So even if it was just sandwiches, I'm sure Jesus was pretty pleased to be eating something more substantial than a scorpion taco. Anyway, dinner probably goes pretty well, that sort of cold respect emanating everywhere as Jesus and Simon the Pharisee dine together. All of the sudden in comes this sinful woman, and everything changes.

The bible tells us that she was a sinful woman, which I suppose means she was some sort of prostitute because that's what most people think of when they hear sinful woman, but it also points out that she had lived a sinful life in that town. I've wondered a lot over the last few days about her backstory, if she had a happy life as a respectable young lady once in another place. I like to imagine that she was once very happy and liked by the people around her, but I suppose that might not be true.

So anyway, this woman annoints Jesus' feet with both perfume and tears, which strikes me as kind of a messy combo, but it is of course the thought that counts. Simon the Pharisee is clearly upset by this, since he's a respectable guy, and he tries his hardest not to associate with "sinful" people. Ignoring the obvious lessons be learned from Simon's reaction, I find something beautiful in Jesus' response. First, he defends her with a clever story, which I like, then he turns to her, and with nothing but love he says, "Your sins are forgiven."

Now lets consider this; whatever her past, this woman's present is bleak. It's dark, sinful, and painful. For whatever reasons she decides that the best course of action available to her is to literally crawl to Jesus and wash his feet with her hair. But the key here, the very vital point to all of this is that Jesus chose to love her unconditionally.

For those who don't know, I work at a treatment center for kids with behavior disorders. One thing that I've noticed in the last 8 months working there is that the kids who recover the quickest are the ones whose parents are invested in them, loving them regardless and showing up to help them. These kids with the most terrible pasts, and yet because of the love of a parent, they're able to overcome. I think that that's pretty typical of humanity. I can't really speak with any certainty about anyone else, but I know that a lot of what I do is motivated by the need to be loved by someone or something.

It seems to me like a lot of the problem with the human condition is that we are missing the love and/or acceptance of someone. Donald Miller, one of my favorite authors suggests that this is the love of God we're missing, and I've got to say that he's probably right about it. I say all of this to bring us around to a revaltion I've had recently.

Jesus didn't spend time trying to convince people to join his new religion. He never once told people to subscribe to a certain religious belief. Rather than preach at people about a new system of rituals, he simply gave them their heart's deepest desire; love.

It sounds cliche, but truth usually does, since it's really old and we all tend to find it piece by piece over the years. I've got to just say it, for the longest time I've seen evangelism the wrong way. It's not about convincing people of anything, it's not about selling them something, it's not even about eternal life. It's quite simply about offering them the love that they so desperatley crave, the kind of love Jesus would offer people.

It's really no wonder the Pharisees weren't receptive to what Jesus had to say, they thought they already had all the acceptance and love they needed. My challenge to you? Find an unloved person and give 'em some lovin'. There aren't many better ways to connect with Christ than to follow his example.

(jake)

There are Worse Ways to Get Superpowers

2007-09-07T18:25:00.000-06:00

A few months back I took an Eharmony.com personality test. The matches it gave me were a joke, but the test itself was pretty insightful. One thing it insisted upon was that I am an artistic soul. I have always wanted to be an artistic soul, so I was pretty pleased to find that I already am one. Being artistic of course requires a lot of you, so I did some research, and here I am, filling my niche nicely. I woke up from my nap today, put on some torn up sandals, 2 bracelets, one hemp, one from an activist group, put on my favorite jeans with the left leg held together by safety pins, and headed off to a coffee shop. Not a Starbucks, but a locally owned coffee shop where I can better fight the man.

I rather like being artistic, because on my way in, 2 girls waved at me. I think that they could tell I was an artist, and from what I understand, girls eventually grow out of the athelete-liking-phase and grow into an artist-liking-phase. It's good to know I'll get to be some girl's phase soon.

I've been reading the Gospels a lot lately, both because I want to know Jesus better and because I'm in a class right now on the first three gospels. I recently got the chance to read through one of my favorite bible stories, and I noticed a few things about it.

We all know the story, and if we don't, we need to read it. It's in Matthew 14, and it tells the story of Jesus walking on the water. Now this is really neat, I always love reading about Jesus' superpowers, because I like the idea of Jesus as this superhero in disguise. So Jesus walks on the water, and Peter being Peter decides to get gutsy, and he asks Jesus to call him out. I like to imagine that Jesus loved this, and that he was thrilled to call Peter out, although I suppose it's possible that he was totally emotionless like I used to imagine him when I was younger.

So Peter does the obvious thing and gets out of the boat to walk on the water. But when the waves get pretty intense, he looks away from Jesus, and boom, starts to sink. So Jesus of course pulls him out, but what I kind of want to focus on is just the simple fact that Peter got great power by just looking at Jesus. I love this aspect of the story, that he gets his power from focusing on Jesus.

I suppose I write this because I feel like in the world around me we have looked away from Jesus. All of you at York, you know what I'm talking about. Don't get me wrong, I love York College, and that's why I say this to hold us all accountable: Whether it was coaches, administration, presidents, teachers, students, whoever, at some point we made the mistake of putting our faith in something other than Christ. To be blunt, I feel like we put our faith in the financial power of athletics, and I find it rather ironic that the result was us losing at a lot of sports. Don't hate atheletes, just calling it like I see it.

So where's this going? Well to be honest, it's simply an acknowledgement. As previously stated a few months ago on this page, I feel like a problem becomes a crisis when it's ignored, so here I go pointing out what we all know but don't want to say. Things are on their way back to healthy, but it'll take a concious effort from us the students to make sure that the higher-ups carry through on it.

The moral of the story is simply this: We may have sunk a little last year, but just like with Peter, Jesus is overjoyed to reach out and pull us out of the water. The catch? We're going to have to shift our focus back on him. As atheletes, as students, as people, it's our responsibility to look to Christ, whether you're a freshman or a senior, a trustee or the president, look to Christ, and see what kind of superpowers he gives you.

(jake)

What I Learned This Summer, by Jake Owens, age 21

2007-08-12T11:00:00.000-06:00

I've been on the road for a while, and then I had to move, but the dust is finally settling, and I'm back at last, so here I am, to plague you with more nonsense.

I have good news. Jesus was a human. I know, you've heard it before, but let's do some considering here. I spent the last two weeks teaching the book of Hebrews to high school kids up in Wisconsin, and I'm pretty convinced that I got a lot more out of it than they did. I have weeks worth of blog material, but I want to focus on this first. Let's have a look:

"For we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses, but we have one who has been tempted in every way, just as we are—yet was without sin." Hebrews 4:15

First of all, I'm not going to directly quote scripture again in this blog, but I will be referencing it, feel free to look it up and check my sources. That being said, re-read that up there. Jesus Christ was God incarnate, and yet he was tempted in the same way we are. That's a verse that never meant a lot to me, because the reality is that Jesus was God, and it never occured to me that he was actually tempted. But consider a few things.

First of all, to quote Nate Cleveland, Jesus was on a different pay scale than the rest of us. To be tempted with money or lust probably wasn't a big deal for him. But when Satan tempted Jesus, he went straight to the top. He promised Jesus the world. Now me, I wouldn't worship someone to rule the world, because we all know that a Jake-ruled world would implode on itself very quickly. Don't believe me? See my new bedroom.

But Jesus was seriously tempted to take this! Think it over, if Jesus came to Earth and there was no risk, if there was no chance that he would fail, then this salvation thing is not what we think it is. For this to work, there had to be a chance that Jesus would give in and would bow down to Satan and take the world. When I think about it, it makes sense. Jesus Christ, praying in the garden was begging God to find a different way to save the world. When Peter offered to make Jesus a king, Jesus rebuked him and yelled at him, he fled from people who tried to give him a crown, Jesus Christ was genuinely tempted to take an Earthly throne and try to save the world his own way!

Now consider that: I don't for one second think that Jesus ever considered going to the Dark Side and doing bad things, I think that he considered different ways of saving humanity, ways that wouldn't suck nearly as much as being nailed to a death stick. But the reality is that in the final moment, in the greatest temptation, in the garden, Jesus Christ answered the question once and for all by saying, "Not my will, but yours be done."

My sins have never been so major as to consider screwing up God's great scheme to save the world, but I think I can sympathize with Jesus. At the end of the day, all of my sins basically boil down to the fact that I am completely convinced that I know better than God, and I'm deciding to do things my own way, not his. My prayer for myself and for anyone who reads this is that we can be possessed by the same spirit of wisdom that Jesus was, and that we can have the foresight to give God his way. He knows better.

(jake)

Tai-Bo for the Soul

2007-07-03T00:10:00.001-06:00

Rather than a normal devotional thought, today I have a challenge for you. Since the purpose of this blog is to exercise in honesty and transparency, I of course will be sharing with you a challenge I've made for myself. Before we get to that though, let's go ahead and have a devotional thought.

One thing that never ceases to amaze me is the fact that people can honestly look me in the eye and claim that they're not affected by their music, their movies, their tv, anything. Video games, television, movies, books, all of it, culture and art affect us as people. If it didn't, we wouldn't buy it. End of story.

So the funny thing is that we as Christians continue to buy and feed our brains poison. It's really quite similar to alcohol or smoking when you think about it; we do it simply for kicks the first time, and pretty soon we're force feeding ourselves a steady diet of spiritual and intellectual death. I'm not going to harp on brainless music and whatnot today, that's not the point. The point is, I have a terrible habit of feeding myself garbage.

Lately, I've been trying to diet. There. I said it. I want to lose weight. You'd be amazed how hard that actually is to admit when you've lived a certain way for a long time. At first, I feel almost ashamed that I'm working on this problem. (See previous posts about honesty. I like the one back at the beginning of the blog myself.) However, as my body responds to my change in diet, I can't help but notice a huge change in my energy level, my disposition, just about everything. Anyone who doesn't believe that what you eat matters has clearly never tried to eat right.

So here we are, coming full circle again. I've begun to wonder what would happen if I were to take a mental diet. If feeding myself only healthy food changes my body, what would feeding myself only healthy thoughts do for my mind? It is with this in mind that I have decided to put myself on a brain diet.

Now bear with me here. I own R rated movies. In fact, I just bought a season of The Sopranos. It's not that I think that all art needs to be G rated, it's just that I need to approach my entertainment with pure motives. Am I watching V for Vendetta for the gratuitous violence, or am I reminding myself of all the difference on person can make? Art has a point people, please don't miss it.

Still, I have lost my focus, my motives are tainted. And so for one week, I will not watch any television, movies, listen to any music, anything that is not completely and totally pleasing to God. Like with all fasts, the criteria of what is "pleasing to God" are completely up to whoever is engaged in the fast. I for one am just going to turn the dang thing off.

One week, that's the challenge. See if your perspective changes. I'll report on what happens to me, I'd love to hear what happens to you. Think of me as a media Shaq.

(jake)

Beauty/Wisdom

2007-06-28T19:18:00.000-06:00

Beauty: It has been at least a year since I last saw a sunrise. In the last 48 hours God has blessed me with the opportunity to see two.

Wisdom:This is sort of a repeat. Still, I feel it's important. I got to thinking about that upper echelon of Christianity, those people that just walk into a room and light it on fire with their spirit. You know what I'm talking about, the kind of people, you probably even just thought of one or two or more. There are people out there that seem completely possessed with the Holy Spirit, people that are capable of doing unbelievable things. The sort of people who decide that they're going to change something for God, and make it happen.

So what's the point? Well I began wondering why all Christians aren't like that. For lack of a better term, let's say that these are the Christians that Paul suggests should be eating meat, and I'm the sort of Christian who should be drinking milk. I started considering the differences between them and myself. As I thought it over, I realized one stunning difference between us. The people that I am looking up to, the people that I want so desperately to be like, these people are not perfect. They are open about their sin, and open about their brokenness.

I think a lot lately about how hard I try to hide my sin. I re-read this blog, and I see so much about unity and about the importance of openness, and I realize how those two things go hand in hand. We can't be unified if we keep secrets from each other. We can't defend each other from Satan if we don't understand how he attacks each of us.

I make a great effort to hide my sins from the world. I wallow in shame and I stay buried in my own thoughts, doing all that I can to overcome myself on my own. There were people just like me in the bible, and once again, my greatest fear has come true. They were the Pharisees.

I am not saying that we should have hours upon hours of confession in church. I'm not saying we shouldn't. I'm saying that God doesn't want to wait for another perfect human to come to him, he's asked for the imperfect. God isn't waiting for us to put ourselves together before we come to him completely, he's asking us to give him what we have and he'll do something with it.

I cannot stress this enough: God loves imperfect people. He loves to work with them, through them, and in them. Your sin is terrible and hurtful to God, but the only way to make things right and to be set free from it is to be open about it, and to be healed.

If I am ever going to be a champion of the faith, if I am ever going to change the world, I have to learn to quit covering up my sin, and to let God work through my brokenness. His grace is sufficient, and it always will be.

(jake)

Forest/Trees

2007-06-28T18:48:00.000-06:00

I'm a big thinker. I don't really waste time thinking about what I'll wear or eat tomorrow, I don't give a lot of thought to the week ahead, I spend my time considering the next several years. I spend my time brainstorming about how I can reach the most people in the biggest way. I don't really consider where I'd like to teach, I consider which foreign country I'd like to go do relief work in first. It's just how my brain works.

Maybe that's why I have so much trouble hearing the voice of God sometimes. I'm not saying that the Lord doesn't think big. In fact, God thinks in huge ways. You know, redeeming the souls of all humanity kinds of ways. But God doesn't let himself get consumed by the big things.

I recently spent some time reading the parable of the talents. It's interesting to me that in this story the master gives more to the people who are faithful with a little. Or maybe we could jump back to Elijah on the mountain? He doesn't hear God in the miracles and disasters, he hears God in the whisper.

I tend to spend a lot of my time seeking God in the big things. I spend my time looking for miracles and revelations, when my day to day life has plenty of miracle in them in the first place. Or maybe my problem is that I don't feel like I'm adequately serving God unless I'm involved in some major project. If all I have going for me is the everyday worship, I tend to feel like a failiure. The irony in this is that God wants to see me doing the everyday worships before he's going to bless me with the big projects.

I need to stop worrying so much about the big things. Not that they aren't important, but simply because if I can't bring God my best in the everday aspects of my life, how can I be expected to bring him my best in the international world saving crusades I want to do?

Maybe it's a little simple, this idea. But maybe that is the idea.

(jake)

Would You Like to Play a Game?

2007-06-11T09:10:00.000-06:00

I support our troops. Political beliefs aside, forgetting a few soldiers I have actually known and what tools they were, I actually do have a lot of respect for people who are willing to make that kind of sacrifice, that are dedicated enough to put their life on the line for something they believe in. All that aside, I think that Army Recruiters are downright funny. I spent a whole year trying to convince a guy that yes I was in fact happy with my college choice and no, I wasn't interested in fighting in Iraq so I could go to college. (It was a painful conversation.)

My favorite army slogan to date is, "An Army of One." I think this is really really funny, because an army of one is probably the safest bet you've got. With the exception of Bruce Willis and Superman, an army of one is ALWAYS GOING TO DIE. And yet I think it is very telling of our culture, both as Christians and as Americans.

I have trouble sometimes being a team player. It's not that I don't want other people involved or that I want the credit, it's that I have trouble remembering to let others help me with myself. It's not exactly an ego thing, it's more of an insecurity thing. That line of thinking says that if I don't let anyone help me, no one can hurt me, which is absurd, but easy to slip into. Ironically enough, when I forget about my brothers and sisters and slip into Army of One mode, I tend to slip out of the real battle that I should be in as a Christian, and instead I get caught up in what I'm going to cleverly refer to as War Games.

War Games aren't the real deal. In a war game you get dressed up, you put on your army garb, you even get a replica gun, and then you go and fake fight. Worse yet, in a War Game you don't even fight enemies, you fight your friends. Maybe me slipping into War Games is a safeguard God put in me to pull me out of the real fight so I don't hurt myself. Maybe it's just that I can't find the courage to get in the real fight without friends. Either way, the fact remains that without a full army, I become ineffective, and instead of fighting enemies I fire blanks at my allies, hurting the people that are supposed to be helping me.

I hope you can follow the metaphors here, because the fact is important. At the end of his life, in the book of John, Jesus gets on his knees and ends his prayer career by praying to the Father that his children will be united, and will be one in spirit. He even says it plainly, "So that the world may know you." There is an obvious reason why Jesus wants us to fight together: The end result will be that the world will know the Father.

I need to let people into my heart, and I need to openly share my life so that I don't slip out of the fight. 80 years of War Games just isn't as thrilling as a real battle, and I need some good war stories if I'm ever going to be a proper old man.

(jake)

Consumer Theology, or How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Bomb

2007-06-07T09:05:00.000-06:00

What are you doing for the Kingdom of God?

Yeah, I know, twelve people just closed the browser all at once. I'm sure at least one person just unsubscribed to my Blog. Don't worry though true believers, I'm not going to give you any guilt trips, just some insight from my own life. No, "Jesus died for you, what are you doing for him?" no, I'm going to get straight to the nuts and bolts here.

Church and I have an interesting history. At the moment I'm kind of shopping around for a permanent church, kicking around a few ideas for bible studies and whatnot, since I recently resigned as Youth Guy at Hastings. Before now though, I've been an employee at two churches, and spent most of my youth hanging out at one. Growing up the Youth Group defined me, gave me hope, and gave me a place to belong. At the same time though, that very same youth group gave me insecurities, disillusionment and disappointment. I'm not placing blame anywhere, I honestly couldn't tell you why I don't feel at home at Liberty anymore, the point is that it is what it is.

As I shop around for a church I've talked to a few other people about their churches, or about what they look for in a church, why they haven't picked one yet. The thing that I hear a lot is something along the lines of, "They just don't have what I'm looking for." I find it interesting that people like me can choose a church based on the same criteria used to select a restaurant. "It's just not my style, I just don't care for that sort of thing."

So I must now ask myself, and in the process you, a question: When in history has church ever been about getting something?

Not Jesus, not Peter, not Paul, no one ever set church up to be what it's become. I'm not talking about instruments and ceremonies, I don't give a crap one way or another about that nonsense, if it gets you closer to God do it, whatever. I'm talking about the selfishness, the way that I've managed to make church into a social club. Church is about giving back, it's about existing in community with others, and bringing my gifts to the family of God.

So maybe you're like me, and maybe you're not getting a lot out of church. That could be because you're like me and you're not putting a lot into church. In fact, I'm willing to say it's the number one likely reason.

And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds. Let us not give up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but let us encourage one another, and all the more as you see the Day approaching. - Hebrews 10:24-25

See that? Right there. Mr. Hebrew doesn't say, "Don't give up on meeting because you might miss communion or a really good sermon or you just can't be a good person without church," he says it plain and simple, don't stop meeting because others need your encouragement!

I need to get this through my skull, whether I'm in a church or searching for one, I need to quit looking for something that suits my needs and I need to find a place where I can contribute. I need to humble myself before God and find a family to help, because others need me. They need you too.

(jake)

Who are you? (Who who)

2007-06-05T23:35:00.000-06:00

I have been running a lot lately. By a lot, I mean about 3 miles every night. It's not something that is exactly characteristic of an overweight 21 year old. It hurts, it's hard, it's sweaty, and it requires great patience to get anything out of, unlike the alternatives, which are sleeping and over eating. Still, I love it. Not just because I'm going to be the sexiest man on campus next year, but because it's a great time to reconnect with God. It's become a daily staple for me, something I crave on my weekend rests, something I get hungry for.

All of that is going somewhere, but put it on hold for a few minutes. Paul writes about the man he wants to be, and the man he is, about how he is caught between who God wants him to be and who his sinful nature wants him to be. Tonight while running, I considered this, the nature of sin, and the nature of humans.

I have come to a revelation, one that I believe is actually from God. God created us. God made us. And whatever we have become, God had something else in mind, something better. Does that jump out at anyone else? In our inception, in the moment of our creation, we were not created to succumb to sin and to fall from the love of God, we were created to revel in God, to live in his presence and to live for him. It is very true that we have all sinned and fallen short of the glory of God, but consider that! We are not sinners trying to change our ways, we are saints trying to reclaim our identity!

The point to be made tonight is subtle but oh so important. Whether it is when dealing with yourself, or when sharing the gospel to others, the thing to remember is this: The goal of Christianity, of life, is not to change ourselves, it's to remember who we are. We are not monsters learning to be good, we are saints trying to recover our lost heritage, we are the lost children of God trying to return to the home we've forgotten.

I could go on and on about the implications of this, but there's no time for that. Maybe that could be more blogs for more days, but tonight, consider this: Who does God want you to be? Who did he have in mind when he made you? I've spent the last few years trying to seek out the man that God has in mind for me to be, and it's been an uphill battle, but by his grace I discover myself a little more every day. God has great plans for you, don't waste time changing and reshaping yourself, get to work on rediscovering yourself and the God that made you perfect, who loves you perfectly.

"For I know the plans I have for you," declares the Lord. "Plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." - Jeremiah 29:11

(jake)

Roses are Red, Cliches are Blue...

2007-05-17T23:43:00.001-06:00

Ever had a crush? Don't deny it. Even I have. And I'm an enigma.

I have a lot of trouble most days reconciling my own desires with God's. I'm sure that that's a normal human problem, or at least I assume it is. I dunno, could just be me. Still, it's something that happens, I get completely reversed in my thinking, and I realize that I want something totally different than God. It's kind of a frustrating way to live, considering that I claim to be a follower of God. As a matter of fact, it gets downright disheartening.

Back to the crush thing. I hate it when people know that I have crushes or am even the least bit attracted to a member of the opposite sex, it's like my one little corner of my brain I try to keep from the world. Still, it's true, even I am susceptible to the charms of some females (some). Ever developed a crush on someone and then suddenly found that you like what they like?

I mean, let's say you hate a certain band or style of music. We'll say Emo, since Emo embodies 90% of what's wrong with the world. You find out that this person you're interested in is really into Emo music. Suddenly Emo's not so bad.

I think that our relationship with God should be like that. I need to learn to focus on God himself, and on loving him, and as I get to know him better, I think I'll be more inclined to love the same things as him. This of course begs the question, "How do I love God more?"

Well, here it is, that hated openness I try to practice. I'm not the sort of guy that can glance at a girl once and suddenly be into her. I have to get to know a person, and on a deeper level than laughing about a movie. For a person to be truly attractive, I have to get to know her and what she loves, what she hates, what she struggles with, what she's passionate about, etc.

I love the fact that the Bible describes Jesus as a groom pursuing his bride. It puts so much into perspective, and helps make sense of the madness that is relationships and why God would want us to put ourselves through that sort of thing. If we want to fall in love with God, we have to spend time with him. If we want to love the things he loves, we have to spend time getting to know him.

So there it is, plain and simple. If we want to do God's will, we have to change our own desires. The only way to do that is to fall in love with God by spending time with him. The message today? Get into the word. Pray. Sing. Do whatever it is that gets you closer to God, just do it now.

Seriously, right now. Stop reading this, go fall in love with Christ.

(jake)

PS - Hey, tell your friends about this. Make them leave comments or something, I decided I want more people to read this, it'd be good for me to know that I'm being open to a lot of people.

Concerning Mustard Seeds

2007-04-14T02:02:00.000-06:00

I've been doing a whole lot of thinking lately. It's kind of the norm for me, but lately it's been even more out of control. I think that self-examination is only natural for someone like me. I'm 21, my best friends are all getting married and starting careers, and I still play in cardboard boxes. I'm not saying I think I'm immature or that I regret my way of life, I just think that it's natural to examine yourself and try to figure out what makes you tick when you're not falling in line with the normal way of doing things.

All this thinking has led me to consider myself and my vision for the future. Most people tend to picture themselves settling down and getting a job in some nice suburb and raising a family. A few people picture themselves doing all of that in a bigger house, but the American Dream rarely changes from person to person. Me? I think I'd rather be eaten by a shark than live the normal life.

I'm not about to suggest that what other people have planned is sinful, is wrong, or is even small plans. It takes a lot of work to raise a family, and I respect that. What I'm saying is that for me, for Jake, the average life just isn't going to cut it. If I were to settle for something like the conventional wisdom then I think I'd be thinking small. I serve a big God with big plans, and to think that human plans can stack up to his is just plain silly. Maybe I belong on the plains of Africa with James taking care of orphans. Maybe I need to go to the ghettos and preach the word. Or maybe I need to get off my butt and finally become a true Christian, not just the American Christian that our culture has created.

One thing that is always scary to do is to share your dreams. So with that in mind, be gentle on me. There is so much I want to do with my life, I want to spend at least a year in another country doing relief work, I want to help kids in the ghettos find some hope, I want to help stop child soldiering in Africa, I want to see China, I want to help start a revival in the church, I want to teach, I want to come back to York, and at some point I'd like to get a masters and a doctorate in something so that I can do my own research on humans.

Big list, I know. There are nights where I literally lose sleep trying to figure out how I'm going to get it all done. The thought that I keep coming back to is that faith the size of a mustard seed can move mountains. But what bugs me is that anyone can move a mountain. The real challenge is moving a human heart. It's dang near impossible sometimes to motivate people, especially yourself. I wrestle with this thought, wondering how much faith is it going to take to move myself. I wonder if it should be easy because of the mountain thing, or if Jesus was being ironic and saying humans are tougher to move than mountains.

When it's all said and done, I find peace in this: faith is a self-sustaining thing. If you have just a little bit of it, it will take care of itself and motivate and multiply itself. Maybe the mustard seed itself isn't what moves mountains, maybe it's the big mother plant that grows out of that seed. If you lack faith, pray for more. The fact that you realized you lack faith means you have more faith than you thought in the first place.

(jake)

Heroes Get Remembered...

2007-04-10T00:24:00.000-06:00

Nothing in the world would be more open and honest than to share the one song that has impacted me most. By my personal hero Reese Roper, performed by my favorite band Five Iron Frenzy, got it when i was in 6th grade, listened the crap out of that cd and even now on my ipod. I would love to be able to write like this.

Hope you hate it.

When I was young, the smallest trick of light,
Could catch my eye,
Then life was new and every new day,
I thought that I could fly.
I believed in what I hoped for,
And I hoped for things unseen,
I had wings and dreams could soar,
I just don't feel like flying anymore.

When the stars threw down their spears,
Watered Heaven with their tears,
Before words were spoken,
Before eternity.

Dear Father, I need you,
Your strength my heart to mend.
I want to fly higher,
Every new day again.

When I was small, the furthest I could reach,
Was not so high,
Then I thought the world was so much smaller,
Feeling that I could fly.

Through distant deeps and skies,
Behind infinity,
Below the face of Heaven,
He stoops to create me.

Dear Father, I need you,
Your strength my heart to mend.
I want to fly higher,
Every new day again.

Man versus himself.
Man versus machine.
Man versus the world.
Mankind versus me.

The struggles go on,
The wisdom I lack,
The burdens keep pilling
Up on my back.

So hard to breathe,
To take the next step.
The mountain is high,
I wait in the depths.

Yearning for grace,
And hoping for peace.
Dear God... Increase.

Healing hands of God have mercy on our unclean souls once again.
Jesus Christ, light of the world burning bright within our hearts forever.
Freedom means love without condition,
without a beginning or an end.
Here's my heart, let it be forever Your's,
Only You can make every new day seem so new.

(jake)

Phalanx

2007-04-06T04:31:00.000-06:00

It's 5:30 AM. I've been at work since 11 PM. I get off in an hour and a half.

Brace yourselves.

So I've been reading this book all night about the battle of Thermopylae. You know it better as that one thing they made 300 off of. Spartan culture is very interesting, especially as a history nerd. The thing that I find so fascinating about the Spartans is that they understood what we as Christians try to understand everyday; no fight is won physically. Everything is about the will to succeed.

The thing that I marvel at about the Spartans is not that they figured out the true nature of the fight, but rather that they figured out how to make it happen. They figured out how to develop and maintain the will to succeed, the will to overcome any challenge. It wasn't through rigorous training and insane methods to toughen up, although that all happened. It was through each other.

The key to Spartan battle rested in the shield. A helmet, a breastplate, these things guarded yourself, and they were expendable. But under NO circumstances were you to lose your big round shield, because with that shield you defended your brother. From day one Spartans were trained in one simple fact: Nothing will ever matter as much as the person standing next to you.

I think that one thing I do terribly wrong with my faith is I individualize it. I'm not saying it shouldn't be personal, between you and God. I am saying that it shouldn't be private, just about you getting to heaven. My faith needs to be more of a group effort. When I think back, the times that I've found courage, perserverence, all of the things that I seem to lack in my weaker moments was when I was standing up for someone else, trying to help them.

Jesus understood it, so did the Spartans. You'll never win any fight that you fight alone, you'll never win if you fight for yourself. But if you fight for the man next to you, then there isn't a force that can stop you.

Friendship is unnecessary, like philosophy, like art... It has no survival value; rather it is one of those things that give value to survival. - C.S. Lewis

(jake)

Saturday Morning Theology

2007-03-25T22:30:00.000-06:00

Tonight I went with Steve to see Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. I'm going to get this out of the way: It was amazing. If someone tells you otherwise, someone is being too analytical and ignoring the fact that it is a freaking sweet revival of the single greatest franchise in history. Now, let's get down to business.

I grew up on stuff like this. Seeing it all in action again, well it just reminded me of all the things that I loved growing up and why. Sure, the dialogue is corny, the plots are predictable, but dang it I love it. At the end of the day, no matter how big and nasty Shredder's plans were, no matter what kind of secret weapon Krang had developed, it just didn't matter, I could always count on the Turtles to come through and win. It could sometimes be an intense 30 minutes, but when it was over, I always knew that the good guys would win. The only thing that I ever really worried about was finishing my cereal before it got soggy.

To be honest, I wish they still had those cartoons on. No matter how rough got for me as a kid, I always had Saturday morning to cling to, that wonderful 3 hours when the good guys were at their best. Working where I do, seeing just how terrible humans can be to each other, it'd be nice to have 3 hours a week where the good guys always win.

Today on the hour long drive back from church, I sat and went through the gospel story in my head. I know that sounds a little strange, but I just started to wonder, how often to we just listen to the story? Sure, we know how to break down individual pieces of scripture and make them say what we want, but how often do we just listen to the story and let it speak for itself? So I did just that, I considered the life of a seemingly ordinary human, and how he performed miracles, how he cared for everyone, loved the unlovable, and did everything possible to change the world, how he was murdered, how he came back from the dead. It's straight out of the cartoons man.

I'm serious about that; the gospel, it's a story that contains the same basic message as the stories that I clung to as a kid. It's full of hope, and of a very simple message: The good guys win. No matter how bad it gets, it pays to be someone who cares. No matter how bad the bad guys are, the good guys are better.

It's a message I needed to hear, maybe one you need to hear too. Cowabunga dudes.

(jake)

500

2007-03-15T00:29:00.000-06:00

So I have car trouble. It's funny, for about ten years now, it seems like whenever anyone in my family gets at least a hundred dollars more than we need to survive, something goes wrong with a car, and everybody gets cleaned out.

Now I'm hardly a car expert, but the nice man at the repair place said something to the effect of, "Your timing belt grumble grumble zig zag, *unintelligable sounds*, durka 500 dollars."

500 dollars. Count 'em. It's a lot. I'm a college student/youth minister who aspires to be a teacher. So your 500 dollars and my 500 dollars are extremely different. My 500 dollars is acheived by being bit, kicked, scratched, spit on, and then gets squandered on rubber belts. Seriously. Every word of it is true.

So where am I going with this? Why right into my own flaws, as usual. I have this terrible "Why Me?" attitude whenever I have money troubles. Seriously, it's a stupid way to live, especially for someone who should basically be accustomed to money problems by now. I always react the same way; run right home, sit down and whine to God about how nothing works out for me.

James makes it clear though. "Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds." That's pretty cut and dry. He doesn't say to consider it joy when I get an easy fix to a big problem. He doesn't say to consider it joy when everything's going my way. He simply says it. Even when nothing is working out, even when things suck, even when I'm being drug right back down into debt yet again, there's no excuse for behaving anyway other than with joy.

So the point? I'm going to try to be more joyful this week. 500 bucks worth of suffering; that's a lot of joy.

(jake)

-If you'd like to make a donation to the Jake Owens Car Relief Fund, send all donations to:
Ghetto Ride
1125 E 8th Box 651
York, NE 68467

Blood Stained Tounges

2007-03-03T15:20:00.000-06:00

I bought a new movie. It's called, "Stranger Than Fiction," and it's by far Will Ferrel's best movie. Not his funniest, but his best. Without ruining the ending, because I hate that so much, I want to share some thoughts it put in my head.

There are two lines that I want to delve into, the first one being, "I'm supposed to knowingly face my own death?" Consider this; Jesus Christ had to face his own death. That's incredible. All I could think about throughout this entire movie was what it would be like to face my own death. How would I handle it? If I knew exactly how long I had left, if I knew that the end were approaching, how would I do it? Would I try to stop it? Would I try to live the most I could in a few short weeks? What on Earth would I do?

But this question is nothing compared to the second line. "I've Killed." It's so simple, it's so blunt, and it's so powerful. I don't know if you could say those two words without any finality; they close the book on so many things. To admit not to another, but to yourself that you are a murderer would have to be a very hard process.

So I tell you these two thoughts to help you understand the admission that I'm making right now. Ready?

I've Killed. And because I've Killed, Jesus Christ had to knowingly face his own death.

Because of my sin Jesus died. I'm no better than Charles Manson, or that guy that killed hookers. I'm just another murderer, just one more guilty conscience trying to escape justice. My own weapon wasn't a gun or a cross, but a tounge. With my mouth, with my complete lack of concern for others or their feelings, I Killed.

Jesus Christ, knowing that I Killed, knowing that my tounge was going to put him on a cross, STILL knowingly and willingly faced this fate. Understanding that I was judge, jury, executioner and perpetrator, he still walked right into death, and he did it for me. He did it to save me.

I try to keep my posts relevant to my life, which means keeping it relevant to the world around me. Life is rough right now where I live, up at Yorkland where there's trouble in paradise. It's easy to point fingers and get mad, and even when that's done you still have to admit that there's no easy way to fix things.

I write this when I do for a reason. I write it to remind myself, to remind my friends, to remind the world of the thing that is of first importance. Jesus Christ willingly died for his own murderers. Don't lose sight of that.

(jake)

Plankeyed

2007-02-27T23:33:00.000-06:00

Reality check. Not for you, for me. This blog is just my attempt to keep my spritual journey in the plubic eye so I'll be held accountable. But the reality check, it's time to stop and evaluate that ever important organ, the heart. Specifically, is my heart in the right place?

See, the road to Hell is in fact paved with good intentions, but Hell has a crappy department of transportation, and they only paved it about a third of the way. After that it becomes real choppy and dirty with spoiled motives and lost passions. In fact, when you think about it, the only difference between the road to Heaven and the road to Hell might just be the direction you're travelling. Hm. Another blog perhaps.

Still, the point I'm working towards is this; I have a bad habit of forgetting who the enemy is. As I sit here with my newfound love Flogging Molly, I have to wonder just who I'm fighting. See, I'm very big on rooting out hypocrisy, especially in my own heart, but sometimes I forget that the issue is my heart, and I start focusing on other people's hypocrisy.

First off, I have no idea of knowing if anyone else on Earth is a hypocrit or not. Me? I am. I'm a freaking Pharisee. What happens is I get all fired up to fix my own heart, then I notice something in me, then I realize that maybe the rest of the world has the same problem as me, then I figure they must, then I attack them for the thing that I was trying to get out of myself, completely forgetting to remove the plank in my own eye.

I suppose what I'm trying to get across is that I need to stop attacking my brothers and sisters. I've said before that grace covers hypocrisy, but do I exhibit that same grace? The answer is a resounding no. I do not. I attack the pharisees and forget completely that the whole issue was my own hypocrisy. I have no motive to help, just to hurt. All I want is to destroy what I saw in myself. I think it's called projection.

My prayer for myself is that I can learn to focus on myself. I've got a lot of ground to cover. My prayer for anyone unfortunate enough to read this mess is that you will be blessed with wisdom to see the sin in your own heart, and that we can all just start trying to fix ourselves, and end up helping each other as a result.

(jake)

A Flowery Post

2007-02-25T01:34:00.000-06:00

Enough fighting the man, it's been a long, painful series of weeks here at York College, and it's time to smile a little.

Jesus had a thing for outcasts. Lepers, adulteresses, tax collectors, murderers, he attracted them all. And even though the religious leaders of the day thought they weren't saving, Jesus Christ did. What bugs me a lot is that I think I'm more like a pharisee than a murderer, and honestly, I'd rather be a murderer.

I've always loved the story of the woman caught in adultery as an example of Jesus' grace, but I think that the one I need to be reading is a couple books later, in the book of Acts. I think that the story I need to read is about a young man named Saul, who was so absorbed in what he thought God wanted that he had lost sight of what God really wanted.

On the road Saul saw Jesus face to face, and Jesus Christ made it clear that he had plans for Saul. We all know how it goes; this murderous hypocritical monster becomes a loving, gentle apostle, teaching and redeeming across the world, sparing no expense to share the gospel of Christ.

I've never killed anyone physically. I've never commited adultery, heck, I don't even download music. What I've done is far worse. I've killed spiritually. I've abandoned my God of love for a God of my own creation, one who smiles on people who sit in pews and say Amen at the right time, who attend youth rallies and go to Christian Colleges. I've shunned those who won't fall in line with my idea of a Christian, and I've shunned those who needed my help.

I suppose that one of my greatest failings is my misunderstanding of grace. I could take the easy way out here and blame the Church of Christ and it's bitter reactionary stance on once-saved doctrine, but the reality is that I beat myself up and treat myself like crap, and it doesn't do anyone a bit of good. In fact, it's like I'm telling Jesus that his sacrifice isn't enough.

Read this next line carefully. Re-read it. Pay attention.

Grace covers even hypocrisy. Even a Pharisee can be born again.

It's easy to get angry and throw my fist up in the air. Being mad at myself is simple. Being frustrated with my friends is no problem. The hard part is sitting down once in a while and remembering that no matter how messed up I am or my world is, God died for me, and he's strong enough to create this Earth, strong enough to forgive a bald kid with a sharp tounge. It even covers the sin of underestimating grace.

Even if you hate snow, smile a little tonight. Jesus died for you, and his blood is powerful enough to forgive Saul, it's powerful enough to forgive Jake, and it most certainly is powerful enough to forgive you. I've prayed that everyone who reads this gets a special blessing straight from the Father, so keep your eyes open, you never know what might happen.

(jake)

Unfortunatley, Crazy Pills do Come in Suppositories

2007-02-20T01:56:00.000-06:00

I believe that The Tick said it best.

"You're not going crazy, you're going sane in a crazy world!"

I feel that way sometimes. Actually, I feel that way a lot. Before you read any further into this, you need to know that this is not a political thing I'm about to write. It's just my reflections on the madness around me. Now that the guns are being put away we can get down to business.

Today I saw on the news that roughly 12 Billion Dollars in United States money was "misplaced" in Iraq. Now if that's not quite the red flag you were looking for, consider this: The people being blamed for this have used the following two arguments to defend themselves.

1) It's not our fault, Iraq has poor bookkeeping, and the real doozie,
2) $12,000,000,000 isn't that much. (I put all the zeros there to make it look silly.)

Wait! We're not done yet! In other news, earlier today television executives declared that American Idol, the show that gave us such memorable artists as Ruben Studdard and that 80 year old lounge singer who claims to be 20, is in fact, "The most influential program in the history of television." Seriously. This show is just churning out one worthless pop diva after another, and they ALL SOUND THE SAME. CRAPPY.

There are days where I look around at the world around me, and then retreat into my room to scream into a pillow with frustration. But what kills me is that when I point this out to people, they nod and say, "Yeah, someone should do something about that."

Listen up fools, it's time to break this thing down.

A friend/mentor of mine once said, "The thing that killed Nixon wasn't the crime, it was the coverup." It's a good point, one we could all learn from. The problem at hand is that we're all looking to coverup our problems and let them go. Sin in our hearts? Hide it. Church not meeting your needs? Grumble at lunch. Double standards all around you? Ignore it.

Problem is, eventually those things will fester and grow in the dark until they strangle us and finish the job. But bring them in the light and they'll melt like a Nazi with The Ark.

Stop hiding things, let's be honest and let's be open. Please. I'm getting really sick of feeling insane.

(jake)

Of Church Pews and Motel Beds

2007-02-17T21:06:00.000-06:00

Here it is, post # 1, hope you hate it.

So here it is, openness. It's hard, and it's humiliating, but by the grace of God someone will learn from it. Like everyone else who grew up in the church, I spent a lot of time isolated from the "real world." I was given a sort of sub-culture in hopes that I would get so wrapped up in it that I would never even have to be tempted to do drugs or vote Democrat. I am extremely grateful that I never did drugs, but I worry sometimes that this had a completely disastrous effect on us.

See within this Christian sub-culture, there were a few unspoken rules. For example, sex and drugs are sins that you must distance yourself from at all costs, even if it's your best friend who falls into a trap of that sort. I'm not proud of it, but I've abandoned more than a few comrades over the years because they started to slip into a different sin.

Thing is, while I was making such a strong effort to stay pure of those terrible influences, I was still listening to and occasionally telling gossip. I was still judging people, and I was still falling short of the prize. I'm not proud of those things, but I know that God's grace is more than enough to cover my petty sins. But that's just it; God's grace is enough. The people who fell into the trap of sex? No worse than me and my petty little judgements. We still sinned, and we still needed Christ.

Now here's what's terrible about this whole scenario. I'm 21 years old, and it's not stopping. I'm still guilty of the same things. I still judge people and try to distance myself. Oh sure, I've gotten much better about coming off as a forgiving person, but the reality is that I don't treat 'sinners' the same way I treat 'saved.' Donald Miller calls it like it is: I'm treating Love like it's a commodity, something that needs to be earned from me.

I can't speak for you, but I know I need to fix this problem. How about you? One of the best things about our Jesus is that he gives us a fresh start every day. He forgives murderers and rapists, and he can even forgive us Pharisees. So I for one choose to make a fresh start. Love is undeserved by all, needed by everyone, and will be given freely by me. Try it yourself, if you've got the guts to humble yourself.

(jake)